Weekly Shocks' Blog

A thought: how I can make the Twilight Craze work for ME, damn it.

I’ll be the first to admit that, when it comes to pop culture trends, I don’t know my ass from my elbow. But even a drooling, toothless half-wit like me can see that vampires are hot right now. Like, totally wicked hot, to borrow a popular phrase from my fellow Bostonians. Duh. I don’t really get why they’re hot, but I’m gonna guess it has something to do with the whole sucking the blood of the innocent thing. Right? Right. So, let’s milk that trend for all its worth, shall we? Here’s my pitch:

Leech University


Hot young co-ed leeches explore the ins and outs of life and love in their freshman year at a prestigious private college in the sultry swampland of the Deep South. There will be the rich, handsome young leech, trying to escape the vice-like grip of his overbearing parents. The underprivileged, orphaned leech, trying to escape her poverty-stricken life in a trash can. The shy, sweet leech-next-door trying to escape an abusive relationship with her jerk-leech-boyfriend, a sociopath who pours salt on her and steals her money. A tough-yet-supportive leech professor trying to escape his loveless marriage.  (Perhaps with the abused leech student? Too risque?) A comic-relief leech whose charming, goofball ways are nearly destroyed when he tries to escape from his addiction to prescription blood-thinners.

Holy shit. This could sell. It totally could. Right? Hello?


Trackbacks & Pingbacks


  1. * Joe Raygor says:

    Woah, new look! I like it.

    Posted 8 years, 7 months ago
  2. * Inigio says:

    This is almost as good as the new 90210. May I suggest a turf war with the local slugs? HAWT.

    Posted 8 years, 7 months ago
  3. * Victoria says:

    In order to make it sell as good as the “Twilight” series, you have to have one of the leaches fall in love with a human who wants to become a leach….but I think you’re on to something here! 🙂

    Posted 8 years, 7 months ago

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