Weekly Shocks' Blog



The 25 Plague: A Brief Apology

Yes, yes, I admit my guilt: I wrote one of those ubiquitous, crushingly uninteresting “25 Random Things About Me” notes on Facebook. I really am very sorry. I can only plead profound ignorance at how widespread this plague would become and I was momentarily seduced by the note’s dizzying promise of fame. Who wouldn’t weaken at the opportunity of finally being able to tell several hundred of your closest friends about that time in 8th grade when you broke your finger playing kickball?! It was a heady moment, but again, I do apologize. I am deeply ashamed of myself. I promise never to indulge in anything so pathetically self-absorbed and tedious again (this blog being the obvious exception, of course).

My shame over writing the stupid thing began immediately after I hit the “Publish” button, but it absolutely skyrocketed when I started stumbling across stories of the Facebook phenomenon in respectable news sources, like The Times, The Globe, and MSNBC. (OK, mostly respectable news sources.) I still view my Facebook life as largely disconnected from reality, so to find out that some goofy little Internet event I participated in was attracting mainstream attention felt dirty and wrong. Most of these news reports sarcastically criticized the monstrously egotistical nature of these notes – and rightly so – although I couldn’t help but wonder if they realized that, by publicizing it, they were most likely exacerbating the condition. I mean, frankly, it’s kind of absurd how many newspapers and magazines are reporting on what is really a non-event.

Hang on! There are probably more newspaper reports on this damn note than Facebook users actually participating in it! So, really, it’s the mainstream media’s fault! Again! As always! Those mercenary bastards, preying on the vulnerabilities of an attention-starved generation of sensitive, tender-hearted children. THEY should be the ones who are ashamed, damn it, not me! I’m not sorry at all! I am PROUD of my note! My friends NEEDED to know those vital, engaging, fascinating facts about me! Hell, THE WHOLE WORLD needs to know! I’m turning the note into a book! It’ll be a bestseller! A Pulitzer-Prize winner! A BOOK FOR THE AGES!!!! SCREW THE MEDIA!

(Perhaps I should retitle this blog post “The 25 Plague: A Brief Apology Immediately Followed by Bitter and Nonsensical Recriminations And Criminally Insane Narcissism”)

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Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. Damn you, Facebook. « Weekly Shocks’ Blog pingbacked on 8 years, 8 months ago

Comments

  1. * suzie says:

    HAHAH god, i even blogged about that PLAGUE. you should be ashamed for participating. perhaps more ashamed than nadya suleman, for bringing more useless NOTES into the world.

    Posted 8 years, 10 months ago


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